


I am Ferdinand von Aegir

by fanficjanai



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Light Angst, Short One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-18
Updated: 2019-10-18
Packaged: 2020-12-21 16:02:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 673
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21077606
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fanficjanai/pseuds/fanficjanai
Summary: Ferdinand learns who he really is with a little help from Bernadetta.





	I am Ferdinand von Aegir

“I am Ferdinand von Aegir”. He weighed the words in his head. They used to bring him such pride. How had it come this far?

* * *

Ferdinand remembered the days five years ago where he was just meeting the other students in his year at Garreg Mach. “I am Ferdinand von Aegir” he would exclaim with such confidence. Always the full name. Always von Aegir. What was he trying to prove? Did he think he was better than them because his family was so highly positioned? Did he think he was impressive for the random chance of being born a von Aegir? Why did he emphasize that so much? It didn’t matter, everyone treated everyone else as equals for the most part.

* * *

Ferdinand thought back to his first battle. As he charged the bandits, he had screamed “I am Ferdinand von Aegir.” Was he hoping it would ward off their attacks? Was he thinking the bandits would know what that meant? It didn’t matter, as he drove his lance into the bandit and the blood rushed out, he realized for the first time how fragile humans really are.

* * *

Ferdinand recalled the day Edelgard revealed her true intentions to the world. Though Ferdinand had already joined the Golden Deer, having determined that Byleth would be able to teach him more than Hanneman, he still obviously had deep ties to the Adrestian Empire. “I am Ferdinand von Aegir,” he roared on the battlefield stung by the betrayal of his nation. Was he hoping that he could restore some decency to the treacherous empire? Was he hoping that he could fight for his father’s sake? Did he think he could end the rebellion then and there? It didn’t matter, Edelgard carried the day and Byleth went missing when the students needed him most.

* * *

Ferdinand then decided to think about the days after Byleth came back. How he and Lysithea had rushed to Hrym to try to save his father. He remembered sinking to his knees in grief upon learning of his father’s death and his father’s crimes against the people of Hrym. He wept, though he couldn’t tell you if it were for his father, for the people, or even for himself. I… I am Ferdinand von Aegir. Was it self-pity? Was he hoping that he could make it untrue? Did he hate the name he had once worn with such pride? It didn’t matter, the war went on, people suffered, and people died. His father’s death was only a footnote in an unending nightmare that was war.

* * *

Finally, Ferdinand went back to the day he married Bernadetta. In his youth he had been promised to her and by a twist of fate he fell in love with her even after their parents were removed from the picture. He recalled walking to the alter where she stood, blushing and beautiful. “I, Ferdinand von Aegir, do take you to be my wife,” he had said. It was the first time he had said his full name since the day his father died. Was the weight of history no longer too much to bear? Was he going to atone for his father’s sins? It didn’t matter, because, for once, the day wasn’t about him. It was about more than him.

* * *

Back in the present, Bernadetta tapped him on the shoulder. “Is everything okay Ferdie? I put the kids to bed but you’ve been at your desk for the past hour.” He gave her a light smile, “it’s okay now dear, now that you’re here. I’ve just been thinking about my name, and what it means. After all I am Ferdinand von-“ He was cut off as Bernadetta leaned in to kiss him. “Honey I don’t care if you’re Ferdinand von Aegir, Ferdinand from down the street, or Ferdinand the circus clown. You’re mine and that’s what matters.”  
He thought about it for a moment, then replied, “You’re right. I’m yours. Now and forevermore.” He went to bed, at peace with himself for the first time in a long time.


End file.
